Tag Archive: #female spoken word artist


This weekend I invested a lot of time focusing on spiritual cleansing.  I felt as if I needed to get grounded among the abundance of the universe.  The benefits of taking time out of your day to appreciate the greatness already within your world are amazing.  Appreciation for the small things becomes more prevalent and sincere.  When your heart is filled with gratitude versus remorse or regret, it allows your true purpose to come forth.  Today, I give gratitude for God given talents.

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” Matthew 5:14-16

God’s light within you shines differently than your neighbors.  We all have unique talents to build an empire off of.  From my observation, those that are living out their purpose shine the brightest.  One of the famous sayings regarding following your dreams states “if you’re doing what you love, it doesn’t feel like work”.  If you read about the history of self made millionaires, they followed their passions first, and the money followed.  As a result, some were able to become the biggest philanthropist.  Oprah Winfrey, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Alicia Keys etc…  In the words of Steve Harvey “you can’t help anybody broke”.  Ain’t that the truth?

Last October, I decided to leave the sales field and I have been in a state of panic and uncertainty every since.  The occupation was stifling me spiritually as I felt I was not using my working hours serving the universe or fulfilling my purpose of being a healer.  My deeds were only getting a corporation and its executives wealthier and I got caught in a cycle of redundancy and monetary competition.  My experiences since, has made me more humble and trusting of God that he’ll keep me while I find my way on the path he wants me to follow.  I am so grateful for this journey.  Many don’t get the opportunity to step away from the hustle of Corporate America to truly find themselves.  Most that do, don’t take advantage of the time given.

I asked God to give me insight into what my purpose was nearly eight years ago.  Once revealed, I remained disobedient for years afterwards.  Now that I’ve allowed God to remove garments of fear from my soul, I am not only grateful but proud of the talents he blessed me with.  I am a writer, a counselor and motivator to many and most importantly, the sole caregiver of a young man that is destined to heal the world in his own way.  I am so thankful and honored.  Therefore, I vow to never let my light go dull, to consistently work on perfecting my parenting and writing skills, and to combine diligent work and non-wavering faith.  My eyes have finally seen God’s glory and my feet shall forever follow.

 

A friend of mine did a 10-day praise challenge and mentioned that the experience was exhilarating for her. During this time of chaos in the world and my own internal conflicts, I thought a praise challenge of my own would be extremely beneficial. Many times, most of our mental energy is spent on reflecting on the why not, why me, when will the pain go away- that we neglect to take pride and honor in the blessings we already have.

Today, I give gratitude to God for his Mercy. According to Wikipedia, mercy “is a broad term that refers to benevolence, forgiveness and kindness in a variety of ethical, religious, social and legal contexts.” God has provided a shield for me in all contexts above. I’ll admit that my personal relationship with God fluctuates based upon my level of happiness. When I am the most content in my life, I tend to stray from learning and meditating on God’s word. My dedication to serving others diminishes and my prayers are said in faint tones, if at all. It’s not because I’m arrogant enough to believe God didn’t help me accomplish the elation I feel within. I just become so wrapped up in the moments and/or relationships, that I have a two track mind. Me and mine.

Conversely, in times of despair and confusion, I call on God to save me multiple times in a matter of minutes. My spirituality has taught me that my relationship with God will never waiver. It’s amazing how watching/listening to Joyce Meyer before I rise out of bed to start my day, tuning into the gospel radio station during my daily commute or giving God thanks for the great and even foolish people I encounter, gives my day and every moment within it a greater purpose.

Today I give thanks and praise to God for loving me unconditionally although my love for him has been conditional at times. I’m grateful for the discernment God has provided me with that I need to improve my on and off again spiritual connection in order to keep joy within my heart. I realized today that I have always been forgiven and welcomed to talk to God no matter how high my sins stacked. Therefore, I need to extend a more forgiving and non judgmental heart to others. I’m forever indebted due to having the most loving figure known to man to talk to on the loneliest of nights. My debts will be repaid by loving and appreciating myself and my family more, proactively serving the community and extending agape love to every soul that crosses paths with mine. I will be as merciful to others as God is to me.

A(she) and A(men)

Luke 6:36

“Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”

I committed mail fraud
the day I confiscated my son’s note to Santa
a criminal act done out of heart felt intentions
to make a little boy’s eyes light up
as bright as the remaining working bulbs on our
anorexic, vertically challenged tree.

A crime of passion
with limited unhappy consequences
well so I thought…
especially since the ghosts of Christmas past
has known me to be the only parental helper
Santa has for him

My son’s seasonal wish list
with hand sketched hearts for postage
unintentionally excluding a destination of return if unread
innocence still gives him the confidence that all wishes can come true
when you believe with your whole heart,
so he made sure not to leave any white marks
in-between the red outlines.

As I unsealed the envelope shaped construction paper,
the cracks in our family structure became visible
avoidance is longer a strong enough adhesive
to seal emotional wounds

He wrote:

Dear Santa:

All I want for Christmas is for my dad
to come and play with me
so I can tell him I forgive him and love him

Please and thank you.

On Christmas Eve,
instead of wrapping gifts
I knelt in prayer for a Christmas miracle
for Santa to deliver potential impossibilities down the chimney.

I hope the North Pole UPS workers delivered my letter.

I wrote:

Dear Santa:

Don’t let my son’s heart turn into coal

Please, I beg of you

Bah! Humbug!

“Making it easy, for the clean-up woman, to steal my man’s love”

 
Who me?
You can’t be talking to me
as if a woman like myself
would want to take that position
in any man’s life knowingly.
 
I’ve always had a distaste for leftovers
and I wasn’t hungry for what I’ve never had,
until he came along.
 
When he was served to me,
his plate appeared to be completely clean
no emotional residue left behind by you
he assured me,
he had room to carry both my son and I
he promised me,
he would position me in such a way
that only the finest garnishments would be placed on me
He knew just the right spices to add to my life
a worry-less mind
daydream induced smiles
made me sweeter.
 
I had no clue he was attempting to offset
the bitterness you left on his heart
like an invisible mildew
A modern day alchemist is what he is
turning shit to sugar
his pet name for me is what he prayed you could be
sweetie
 
I helped him turn back time
he’s at a place of happiness again
but I had no idea he was lost
still trying to find his way back
from the fork in the road you two paved
with a foundation less sturdy than quicksand
 
He never told me
the reason he feel in love with me
was because I stopped his heart from sinking
I wanted to be this man’s wife
not his fucking lifeguard
 
Shit I’m asthmatic
and loving a man who’s emotionally
coupled to another woman
is a never ending battle
that I may not have enough wind for
I repetitively use too much breath
repeatedly asking him to mark visible boundaries
that’s as clear to you as the stretch marks you earned
as the mother of his child
See there’s lines that you need not cross now
the happy beating side of his heart
the parts of his brain that still believes in his own dreams
I worked to revive that!
 
My hands are calloused from holding this shovel of hope
trying to cover the underlying issue
in my relationship with him
he still wants to create memories with you
while I’m trying to keep that part of his life buried
so he can live life with me
 
I’m tired of fighting with him
not because of what I do or don’t do
but because he refuses to accept
that he’s not over you
my heart can no longer be used as a rag
attempting to shine up your trash
to be my treasure
I want to be the only woman living in his heart
not the servant,
cleaning up the mess you two made
 
I quit
 
© 2012 Tenisha M Jones

Yesterday, we argued
Today, I sit
eyes swollen from lack of sleep
tears flooded out my sweet dreams
creating a marsh of hurt and disappointment
and now the vision of our future is blurred

Love definetly makes you blind,
my heart has blacked out
dark hope adds more weight to it
making my medium body frame too heavy
I can’t find the strength to lift these bed sheets off my body,
I’ve flat lined emotionally,
mentally attempting to repent the verbal sins committed…
ego destruction,
refusal to turn the other cheek,
denial of loving our lover,
in a way that we want to be loved
–just for that brief moment

But at this moment,
my soul is in a temporary hell
I’m so hot…
heated…
burned up on the inside
wiping away tears steaming down my face at the same velocity of sweat
but ironically, we don’t seem to be working out

I’m paralyzed by fear and awe-struck at the same time
watching this man made fire ignite to the level
of causing injury in our relationship-
a work of art that people once gaped at
our beauty fades as fatal wounds on our pride appear
and we may not be able to survive from this

Suicide breeds guilt
the signs that were there,
we’ve both witnessed before
emotions overruled wisdom
and we both chose the wrong ammo to fight with

Communication is the most powerful and underused tool we have
its versitile purpose
shoots out comfort in being heard
and solutions to douse out problematic  fires
Where did we place our finger, when emotions were triggered?
Other than each other’s face?

It’s hard to rebuild a burnt bridge
damn near impossible,
when I can’t even find the strength to get out of bed

Love’s Death Bed

©2012 Tenisha M Jones

SINGING “The sweetest thing I’ve ever known, was like a kiss on the collarbone”

…and the seductiveness of that moment
stays with me throughout the day
love muscles twitch and squeeze tightly from flash backs
until moistness in your play area
abruptly ends my day dreams
I want to run to my boss and say
I must leave work early today

My stomach feels queasy from nonstop fluttering
I’m barely able to stand on legs that has the strength of a wuss
palpitations of a fast beating heart
makes my eyes water, crying out your name
I have to get another dose of medicine
I’ve been poisoned by my orgasmic lust for you
and you’re my doctor and the antidote

SINGING “And when I get this feeling, I need sexual healing”

Kiss me gently on the forehead
using your lips to verify my whole body is feverish
affirming I’m hot for you

Make me better

Examine the deepness of my throat
dispense a liquid elixir to take away my dry mouth
put on your glove,
to complete the rest of this physical exam
while tickling the trigger spot on my neck
with the tip of your tounge
the sensation takes my breath away
bringing the tempo of my beating heart down

My breathing synchronizes with yours
and after three short moans
shoot me with your long hooked magic stick
pain never felt so good

SINGING “The make it alrighter
                   The get you through the nighter
                  The bad times undoer
                  The joy bringer
                 The love giver
                 He is…. ”

Yes, you are painfully pleasurable
I moan as you thrust inside me
requesting open hand smacks on my ass
inciting you to go harder
my screams you never try to muffle
you smile when the neighbors greet you by your name
every time you make house calls
you’re the angelic twin of Dr. Death
curing my love illness
yet at the same time,
reviving it all over again

Copyright 2012 Tenisha M Jones

The number eight symbolizes new beginnings
and as this birth date is approaching for you
I’m scratching my head
wondering where did time go?
It seems like you were crawling
not so long ago
now the sway in your walk
mirrors your God Father’s
and your mouth runs all the time
it’s like incurable diarrhea  of the mind
leaving many adults to agree
your spirit is gracing this earth for another lifetime

You’ve returned as this millennium’s prophet
as your mother I feel holy
glowing from my imaginary halo
after being crowned as the 21st century Mary
handpicked to birth and raise greatness

I feel constant pressure from my destined obligation
which makes me more grateful for your witty sense of humor,
the continuous sound of laughter in our home
makes a rough day at work and the intenseness of life all better

As your height is closer to matching mine
I become more appreciative for the memories we create together
the songs you write and sing to me,
the nights where you want to cuddle closely,
even when I have to fuss at you for acting like a baby
I remind you,
“You’re a big boy”
but deep in my heart,
I don’t want you to get any bigger

The number eight symbolizes new beginnings
and as this birth date is approaching for you
I’m contemplating adding one less candle to your cake
while I close my eyes and make a wish the same time as you
I’ll ask for a touch even better than Midas’
my magic contact will press pause on your maturity
and you physically outgrowing me
I’ll make a plea for you to stay seven for one more year
when you’re just tipping the scales of being too big to fit on my lap
and during long car rides I can peep you napping in the back
drooling…
a lot…
when you still enjoying holding my hand as we walk across the street
because you still think mommy’s protection is still kinda neat
and you know the end results of disobeying mommy is kinda scary
so you remind me,
“Mommy-you told me to be a big boy”
deep in my heart,
I know prior to this moment
I should have been more careful for what I wished for

 Copyright 2012
Tenisha M Jones

The old folks and pro lifers say babies are not mistakes
they declare that the creation of a new soul is a gift from God
and while my moral being believes that to be true
the logical perception of my brain says something is all fucked up in this messaging

What words will I use to communicate to my baby
that he was conceived from an act of sin
to provide a lesson of realization
yet avoiding the visualization of the shaking of God’s head
at the time of his conception
I don’t want to cause him to walk with his head hanged low
because the timing of his entrance was a missed projection
since mommy was still carrying her maiden name

I’m a grown ass woman and I still can’t let go of a similar mental picture
I did a lot of praying in order to make my neck stronger
since my head was carrying such dreadful thoughts
just knowing my brother and I’s existence
is only because of my mom’s denials to make man made wishes come true

The women in my family were taught two important things regarding our vaginas
one-not to douche too often
two-never cleanse your womb of seeds
both are known to dry your pussy up
the latter is an undesirable stake
of the lustful mistakes
made by adults who like fucking each other
more than they like talking to one another
two people who labeled naked slow grinding as making love
so it’ll sound more acceptable
versus taking it slow and first falling in love
before creating a being stated to symbolize God’s love

I swear I’m confused,
I adore my son, niece and nephew
and I damn sure love being me
and having a big brother who will do anything to make me happy
but society’s label of the last two generations within my family being a mistaken curse
makes me pissed yet forces me to really think
we have to teach our children differently

My mom is my hero for believing she was a bearer of blessings
and I strive to make my father swallow his words
I’m an irreplaceable piece of life
a prize for his sobriety
but if the flip was switched on a manmade human substance vacuum
he would be missing mine and my baby’s existence
and our homemade Christmas and birthday cards
his walls would resemble his life without me-bare

A part of me will forever be mad at my dad
for his momentary consideration to kill me
but me knowing my soul’s existence was damn near past tense
forces me to take a stand on an issue that the man in my life accepts and respects
but my heart tells me he’ll never understand
since all his children and siblings were preplanned

An abortion would have made the story of my life an imagined dream
a fantasy that my lover would never have had the pleasure of experiencing
my son’s smile would be voided from the world
at no time would my greatness be known
I can’t fathom being a lost, erased, vacuumed and disposed of entity

All adults know the consequences of making mistakes
and most have heard the definition of accountability
whether they chose to apply it – is an individual decision
as is abortion

But me living an unwanted actually
gives me the conviction that humans should never play God
and decide to scrape his blessings away
I pled with people as well as myself to wrap it up
instead of wiping the world of an ordained soul’s permanence
The old folks and pro lifers say babies are never mistakes
and I happen to agree

© 2012 Tenisha M Jones

However your emotions sway, you will absolutely love the self published poetry book, A Gemini’s Syllogism

For Immediate Release

Tenisha M Jones
Pineville, NC
(704) 359-7044

THE SIDEWAYS LOGIC OF A GEMINI IS NOW REVEALED

Are you a fan of poetry? If so, you’ll absolutely fall in love with Tenisha Jones’ debut book, A Gemini’s Syllogism. Tenisha is a spoken word artist out of Charlotte, NC who possesses unique view points on love, social affairs and the nation’s morality.  A Gemini’s Syllogism is a collection of poems touching five subjects from two different perspectives. Each stanza provides thought provoking challenges for us all to view our neighbors with more of an open mind while taking a more realistic view of the reflection staring at us all in the mirror.

As a single parent, 30 something career woman, Tenisha Jones’ views are definetly not mainstream and her talents allow her to create unique imagery that serves as an easy yet delightful read.  Copies of A Gemini’s Syllogism are available for shipping for $10 and $1 for shipping.  The book can also be ordered for Kindle devices for $3.99.

To have a copy shipped please use the link below:

To Order A Gemini’s Syllogism via Pay Pal:

To order for Kindle Devices:

Amazon Kindle Order

Thanks for you support!

For Immediate Release
Poet.She Teams up with Barnes & Noble for Nationwide Fundraiser
Contact: Kelly Rae
E-mail: poet.she7@gmail.com
Written by: Tenisha Jones

Anywhere in the USA, 16 January 2012:  For everyone who’s a lover, supporter and/or encourager of literary arts, here’s a great non-hassle way to help promote the literacy movement.  From January 27 – January 31 2012 join forces with a non-profit group originated out of Greensboro, NC, Poet.She.  Poet.She is a female spoken and literary group that strives to strengthen the female presence in the literary and spoken word community. This group consists of women primarily based out of NC, SC, VA, MD, DC and ATL who are passionate about poetry, writing, literature and want to share that passion with the community. 

The members of Poet.She are making fantastic strides and building a strong reputation in the southeast region.  All members are fueled from an unbreakable passion to have the females voice, from elementary age to our elders, heard.  For this reason, Barnes and Noble has partnered up with Poet.She to help do just that. 

Spoken word is a beautiful artistic expression that Poet.She believes has a need to be shared more frequently and in very diverse creative ways.  Poet.She’s goals are to continue hosting writing workshops for school age children, including institutions of higher level education, to complete their first stage production and support local community events that promote literacy.  The group, along with Barnes & Noble, needs your help to make a more impactful change in 2012.

SAVE THE DATES: POET.She & BARNES & NOBLE BOOK FAIR
January 27 – January 31 2012

This is how it works:

1) You go to your local Barnes and Noble anywhere in the U.S. and buy a book or electronic under the name Poet.She and ID # 10654028 on January 27th

2) You go online and purchase Barnes & Noble items using the same name and ID #

3) A percentage of sales go to Poet.She for our big Poetry Slam in February

4) You can shop from Jan 27th – Jan 31st and ask for sales to go to Poet.She

Your challenge: To encourage 30 friends and 30 family to come out to their local Barnes & Noble

Proceeds from this event will go to the 1st Annual Female Poetry Slam Invitational on February 10th in Greensboro NC

 HELP US, HELP BRING THE LOVE OF BOOKS AND SPOKEN WORD TO OUR LOCAL COMMUNITIES

For More Information on Poet.She and upcoming events:

http://www.ladybizness.com/#!poetshe