It has been repeated in conversations, blogs and news articles over and over… it is unhealthy to bring the baggage and emotional turmoil of a past relationship to a perspective new one.  But I have to ask how often do we ignore our own intuitions and mislabel them as prejudice or being stereotypical?  According to Norman Cousins,  “history is a vast early warning system”.  Also, red is one of the most vibrant colors, so why are we not heeding faster to the flashy flags waving right before our eyes? 

One conclusion of why some people continuously pick the wrong potential mate – they enjoy the thrill of going after something they shouldn’t have.  The “touching the stove when mommy says it hot” syndrome doesn’t die with increased numerical age.  The intensity of the adrenaline rush when being risky diminishes the pain of potential heartache, at least temporarily.  In the words of Steve Harvey “God don’t bless mess”.  So when you smell garbage close the lid to your heart and set the person to the side to be pick up by those where self-esteem is homeless internally.  Be real with yourself and only associate with dates that possess what you desire and DESERVE in a mate.  If not, you’ll be a single settler or a miserable mate.  Neither option sounds appealing to me.  If it does to you, I would highly suggest finding a home for self-esteem within you.

Possibly Never

I don’t claim to do anything the best
you will never hear me brag that I’m better than the rest
but every time I open my eyes – I try
I’m the hardest trying individual you’ll see

logistically trying to stay one step ahead of me
although everyone says leave the past in the past
but that’s the only way I avoid continual falls
from tripping over my own feet & landing on my ass
I want a firmer behind, so instead of a hard head
I maintain a hard heart
that you’ll never break apart
You sir, look like heartache

Remember I’m not blind
and my wide open eyes has seen your type before
but there’s so much that remains mysterious
which mentally stimulates me…
everyday I crave to learn something new
about your history,
your math ability when you multiply your money stacks
your chemistry,
our chemistry…

But you look like a teacher from the past
Mr. Wrong
so I withdraw from the lesson
the graduation of our status
from friends to in a relationship
happens possibly never
©2011 Tenisha M Jones